- Sun, 09:53: "Who knows what hellish future lies ahead? Actually, I do. I've seen the rehearsals" - Terry Wogan's opening comment on Eurovision 2007. RIP
- Sun, 17:00: When a farmer casually counted his cows in a field he had 197 of them; but when he rounded them up he had 200.
- Sun, 21:08: There was never going to be an EU deal 2nite. Tusk came to talk and whatever happened, wld have 2 return to Brussels b4 anything cld happen.
- Tue, 17:00: A lorry carrying Vicks Sinex crashed on the M25. Police believe there will be no congestion for at least 3 days.
- Sun, 17:00: What is the difference between a nicely dressed man on a tricycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tyre.
- Mon, 17:00: Only at the ages of 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19, 23, 29, 31. 37, 41, 43, 47, 53, 59, 61, 67, 71, 73, 79, 83, 89 and 97 are you in your prime.
- Mon, 23:48: RT @TimLawTax: @chhcalling Saw this & thought you might like it. "A couple of parrots are sitting on a perch. One says to the other, 'Can y…
- Mon, 23:48: Retweeted Tim Law (@TimLawTax): @chhcalling Saw this & thought you might like it. "A couple of parrots are... https://t.co/a0HHvBLSFO
- Mon, 23:49: RT @Pundamentalism: Mr. Brightside & Roxanne were found dead this morning. The Police are looking for The Killers.
- Mon, 23:49: Retweeted James Martin (@Pundamentalism): Mr. Brightside & Roxanne were found dead this morning. The Police are looking for The Killers.
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